Project II, I'm On a Roll

It may be the time of year. Last winter I got all crafty -- for two scarfs' worth, anyway. The first one I knit, the second I crocheted.

This year, I went at it again and produced the Möbius scarf for my cousin SuziTheFloozy (that's her e-mail handle, not a description of her proclivities.) I mailed it last week, but don't know if she's received it yet. Snail-mail earned its nickname.

Then I decided to make a Remorse Hat. I have/had a very dear friend with whom I have lost contact. Totally my fault. I moved and forgot to give her my new address.

I'm not the world's greatest letter writer and after a year or so of not writing, I was so embarrassed I didn't know what to say. I'm not going to tell you how long it's been now, but it's way past mere embarrassment.

So I decided to knit her a hat. Don't know why, just did. So I looked at 50 bazillion hat patterns on-line and in library books until I found one I liked, I thought she would like and looked easy enough for a neophyte knitter to accomplish. I got the yarn and decided on alternate trim -- the little sunflowers are cute, but I wanted something a bit more sophisticated.

Then I realized I had no earthly idea of how to knit in the round. Oops.

Ah well, what the hell, crochet is not constricted to two dimensions. I got out my trusty crochet hook and had at that yarn.

Ended up with one ridiculous looking hat.

All was not lost, however... Did you know that felting is just totally in style?

I went to the thrift store and bought a pair of white tennis shoes for $3, turned the old Maytag on as hot as it would go and let the shoes stomp that hat into submission.
The first form I tried to block the resulting sodden mess on didn't quite work. The hat is too deep and the pot handle made a notch in the bottom of it.

I made a tight roll of three old bath towels. Looks like they'll do the trick. The string is to attached the planned trim: two pompoms that will fasten to a gold button and be removable (depending upon whether she thinks pompoms are cute or dorky.)Now to work on a long and heartfelt letter to go with it.

Scragging the Comments

I adore getting comments on my blog. It means it's more than just mental masturbation (can I say that word in a mostly "G" rated blog?)

Sometimes, though, I accidentally kill them when trying to post them.

The problem, you see, is the button colors in Blogger's interface. The color for "Publish" and "Reject" is blue. For both of 'em. Now how am I supposed to tell the difference? Do they expect me to actually read or something?I hit the one on the right for go and it went all right, right into the irretrievable aether.

So, Anonymous, sorry about that. I really did mean to publish your comment about my vocabulary. And, no, you're not the first one to say that I never use a nickel word when a 25¢ one will do. If it helps at all, I don't spell the little ones much better than I spell the big ones, which is why I say, "Hallelujah for spell checkers!"

Thank you for your comment and please feel free to try again, maybe I'll get it right.

Happy Cats

Sachi and Kitsu would like to send a shout out to the EarringLady and her MaineCoon cat. They own the best cat tree ever because the MaineCoon was too big for it. He tipped it over every time he tried to hop up, so EarringLady passed it along to the girls. It's their favorite place for supervising kitchen activities. And it keeps them out from under my feet, so thanks from me too.Thank you also to my ChosenSister who made the pink meow pillow, or Kitsu's Power Beneath the Throne Cushion, as I like to call it.

The thing about having two cats in one house is you cannot have CatA and CatB, you cannot have Cat1 and Cat2, nor can you have CatPrime and CatSubPrime. You must CatA and Cat Prime so that they both can call themselves Cat Number 1. The pink meow pillow and the proper attitude allows for this in the dual cat kitchen.

The Crock Pot Prophylactic

I use my crock pot a lot. It's a great way to have a meal ready at the end of a day without having to fuss. The one thing I didn't like about it was the clean-up. Geeze o' pete, that was a pain in the derriere. My crock pot is a Salvation Army crock pot; a battered old timer that came without a lid. But I measured the top diameter of the crock and found a glass lid that (kinda) fits.

A couple of years ago I discovered crock pot prophylactics and now I'm a happy homemaker. (Ain't that phrase enough to make a feminist retch?)

Tonight's dinner is a cheap pork roast that will be transformed by the crock pot into ambrosia.

1. Insert prophylactic.

2. Season meat.

3. Stuff meat into crock pot.

4. Pour in your chosen liquid to just cover the meat. I like to use the Engineer's leftover coffee, my theory is that the acids in the coffee help tenderize the meat. Believe it or not, it does not smell or taste like coffee. I don't do this if we are having Mormons for dinner company, wouldn't want to violate their prohibition on "hot drinks", but otherwise, for pork or beef, coffee is my liquid of choice. If there's not enough coffee, I will use water or canned broth to top if off.

5. Stick in a bay leaf or two -- for the aroma if nothing else.

6. Pop the lid on and cook at the appropriate setting for at least six or seven hours. I always turn the overhang on the prophylactic up like an Elizabethan collar because the replacement lid doesn't quite fit. Turning it up funnels any condensate back into the crock pot instead of letting it drip on the counter.

7. Unplug crock pot and use one of those kitchen tools that looks like a kitty litter scoop and a pair of tongs to retrieve the meat. You'll need both because it should be falling apart tender.

8. If you want to, scoop out a little of the liquid to make gravy. My fluffy parts don't need the extra calories, so I don't. (I deserve kudos for this because I love gravy.)

9. Serve and enjoy.

10. After crock pot has cooled enough that you won't be burned, move it right next to the sink, carefully lift the prophylactic from the crock and drain it into the disposer. Throw the prophylactic away and rinse out the crock.

Dinner's over, the Engineer's full and happy. He does love pork, potatoes and cabbage.

Best part, NO soaking or scrubbing the pot. Yay, hurray!

Cat Alarm

I heard great rattlings and rustlings coming from my office closet, then a snarling cat bolted out of it. She darted under the desk chair, crouched over her prey, growling.

I bent over and looked to see what she had.

"Oh crud, she's got a rabbit!"

As I bent to rescue it, I realized that she had gotten into my arts and craps storage box and pulled out a roll of three rabbit skins I've had for years. I'd made a cavewoman doll for my niece and bought pelts to make her clothing.

Ah well, had my squirt of adrenalin for the day

The Möbius Scarf - Chapter 3

The scarf is Möbiused. The end-to-end anastomosis wasn't at all difficult. The seam isn't immediately visible to the naked eye, though it has a firmer texture to the palping finger. I took all of the remaining yarn (including the remaining ends after weaving in the extra from joining the three skeins of yarn), made a scruffy little pompom and hung it from the seam. This is a very metaphysically safe scarf in that it is very imperfect. Many ancient lores hold that it is not safe to strive for perfection, thus angering the gods. Remember Arachne who challenged the goddess Athena to a weaving contest and ended up being turned into a spider for her winning efforts. Spiders weave webs to this day.

Navaho and Hopi weavers always make sure there is a break in the patterns of their woven rugs. I have heard two explanations: 1. That perfection not p.o. the gods. 2. The break ensures that the weaver's soul will not be trapped in the pattern.

Sure hope SuziTheFloozy likes it and that she will be as safe in the wearing as I was in the knitting.

The Scarf Stage 2

The knitting is done. How do I know this? Simple, I have no more yarn.

The scarf is 4½ feet long and one foot wide. I knit two thirds of it on aluminum needles, then switched to bamboo. I like the bamboo better, they're not so cold and they make a nicer sound when they click together and slide off each other.

Now I need to put a twist in it and neatly join the ends, an end-to-end anastomosis as it were, to make it into a Möbius scarf.

I hadn't realized when I started this project that the knitting world had been-there-done-that with the Möbius scarf until I got a comment on my earlier scarf post from a knitter named Marsha. Now I'm going to have to try one on circular needles so it won't have a seam.

Rumor has it that there's a knitted Klein Bottle purse too. That I gotta see.