Friday, June 29, 2007


I went to Sam's Club today to buy trash bags and dish soap. I was walking down the aisle in the middle of the store when it happened, when I saw...

A grove, a veritable forest of seven foot tall palm trees with a big sign announcing, "Only $10.97."

How could I resist? I checked out all the palms I could see and picked the perfect one. I put it into my cart and hurried to the checkout, trying to navigate, peering through the fronds.

Luckily the lady parked next to me returned to her car at the same time I returned to mine, so I put the glamour items into my trunk and waited as she pulled out.

With the front passenger door all the way open, I managed to get the enormous palm into the car, then I drove home with my prize, gloating all the way.

When the Engineer got home I made him help me pot it up into a bigger pot. It looks grand.

Then, after having made the financial (well, $10.97 plus tax, recycled pot and soil) and emotional commitment to it, I looked it up on the Internet.

Majesty Palm, Ravenea rivularis, native to Malaysian river sides. Requires warm weather, partial shade, high humidity and lots of water and fertilizer. Does not do well as an indoor plant, but very nicely in the ground in warm humid areas of the country where there is no danger of frost.

Which doesn't exactly describe Utah.

This is going to be interesting.

1 comment:

alex beech said...

Hi, I just found your blog through Word Imperfect. I thought your definition was hilarious.

Very funny post. I think your plant will survive. I grew up in a climate where palms flourish.

You have to do a lot to kill one, or rather nothing. They usually die from neglect. I suppose we all do.

Anyway, I keep two cacti. And they're in pretty good shape.